INDIVIDUAL PSYCHOTHERAPY
All of us have had to cope with stress one way or another. Most of the time, we can manage our stress on our own or by engaging in some stress relieving activities such as talking to friends, reading books, getting physically active, meditating, to name a few.
However, people tend to look for professional help when their capacity to cope is overwhelmed, or when they are feeling stuck; when their attempts at handling things are becoming more of a problem than a solution; when they’ve tried everything but the mental pain and behavior problems persist.
Some frequent examples of what I call mental pain include anxiety, grief, depression, flashbacks of distressing memories, excessive shame or guilt, fear of abandonment, obsessive thinking, indecisiveness and excessive anger, just to mention a few. The amount or intensity of the pain is unique to you, and depends on your resilience, life experience, the amount of available support that you have and the actual situation. Mental pain that doesn’t get addressed tends to get denied, the old push-it-under-the-rug strategy that may buy us time, but eventually grows, making us trip and fall – meaning the pain we denied gets manifested, for example, as anger outbursts, insomnia, addiction, withdrawal or impulsivity.
The good news is that by making space to honor your distress and make room for some self-examination, your pain and suffering can be transformed. Our minds (and bodies) are designed to self-heal, as long as we provide the essential ingredients for it to do so (like healthy foods, rest, exercise, etc.). In the case of our minds, it needs safety, connection, self-compassion, conscious attention, and a lot of patience and acceptance, in order to heal.
Safety is a pre-requisite for healing: without feeling safe with me – as a psychotherapist – you won’t be able to share your doubts, worries, problems, and fantasies. Safety in relationships is created when you experience the therapist (me), as non-judgemental, compassionate, caring and available to be with you in your struggle.
However safety within your self is just as important. We cannot explore painful and difficult aspects of ourselves if we don’t trust that we are not going to fall apart. Human connection enhances this process. The reassurance of a calm, experienced person is extremely powerful in helping you trust your self and trust the process. The sharing of one’s experience in a safe and validating environment makes the journey towards change extremely powerful.
I believe that if you have an experienced, calm clinician with whom you connect well, you can co-create an environment where new understanding, acceptance and, finally change, can happen! Researchers have pointed out that our brain is “plastic,” meaning the actual brain structures are moldable throughout our lifespan – and this molding results from…experience. A good therapeutic experience depends on a good fit, safety, emotional attunement, respect, curiosity, information and collaboration.
Last, but not least, this is a collaborative endevour. You will only get a positive outcome in as much as you are invested in this process. Your role in psychotherapy will be to share your concerns, your experiences and what your feelings and thoughts are during our sessions. My role will be to listen carefully, ask questions and offer new perspective on your issues.
If you are ready to start, I will be happy to help you.